“Seriously,
Brian. Its time you realized I was here?”
“Peace
& serenity… very important.”
She
expected me to come unswerving to her after all she had done? She had taught me
the tough way. I don’t have that much veneration for ladies anymore, she ought
to know better. I let the thought sink in. I took a fleeting look at my watch
and realized that she was crazy. It wasn’t even an hour since I arrived. I
didn’t know what to tell her by the way. All I could see were insensitive
images that made me get this hard lump in my chest that kept coming &
coming. I wished I could throw it to her, open my heart up & let her see
the dent it had cost/ made. She really expected me to be normal? I almost
shouted to that thought!
“Sweetheart…
I wanted (Never heard the rest of it)”
“Hmm!!!
What?” “Oh! Sorry! You were saying?”
“You
see!” “You weren’t even listening to me!”
“Yes. I
won’t lie Cera, I wasn’t listening, and my mind was far away.”
“How
far? You can tell me, right?”
“No!
That privileged was long scrapped remember?” “& by the way, Cera, don’t
sweetheart me in any of our conversations, from now onwards, okay?”
“But you
are…”
“I am
now huh? I am not fascinated!” “By the way, I didn’t come here to argue okay?”
“Right.
I get you loud and clear… Be easy now…”
“So you
were saying what about the child you carry?”
“It’s
yours Brian” “The last time we were together…”
“Before
you even continue talking, the last time we were together, you were still
dating… what’s his name again? Whatever, that Mr. Barclays Guy…”
“He is
Quale, Brian, Hi name is Quale” (With a defined quiver in her voice – whatever
it meant, I didn’t care this time round. I was done reading her cues.)
“Whatever,”
“Yes, the last time, you came into my house; you had slept with Quale for two
months? Actually you did mention after we had sex, that you felt like you had
cheated.” (I tried counting to a hundred to reduce the antagonism welling up
inside but it didn’t seem to work…) “Then here you are death confident that the
baby is mine?”
“Yes I
am telling you, it’s your child” (The quivering voice again)
“Lemmi
get this straight, you tell me, our relationship ain’t working, one month
later, you tell me you have decided to settle with your friend Quale, Not just
settle, you emphasized you loved him & you are already in a relationship…
& now the baby you carry is mine?”
I
couldn’t help think how this term has been tainted of late, for her case;
fitting in the term relationship was to cover up for some fantasy meaningless
sex… I would play along to ‘rebound’ whatever but… at least that’s what I
thought then. Definitely acrimony had clouded my mind to the extent of thinking
of the grossest things, for the first time in life; I was disgusted to the
point of purging. I didn’t throw up. But what you see in movies; it’s true.
Some people, some acts, some feelings, make you just feel like throwing up. I
tried to calm myself down. Okay! They are in a relationship. That was done. I
just needed to work on moving on. But this baby issue was dragging me helpless!
“… then
months down the line you are telling me that you have my child, it doesn’t make
sense. For whatever reason you decided to move on with Quale, at my age you
cannot convince me that you never had sex with Quale, actually I know you had
to recompense for all the intimacy you missed those days that I used to spend
away on duty…”
“I
didn’t say we never had sex…”
“…Ehh.”
“I told
you we use protection.”
“So
that, I am to swallow?” “Try another one”
I
realized my glass was almost empty & I started jiggling on my seat. I
wanted to wake up & get another one, but also wanted to stay that way. I
started wishing I was within Emmah’s sighting range. I then realized that by
this hour, no lady would be idle. I decided to put my now, empty glass away
& get back to this contentious exchange.
“Brian…
I am talking to you”
“I am
listening”
“You
have to believe that we use protection every time.”
“Last I
checked you were on the pill, or Quale told you to stop that huh?”
“I
stopped….”
“Hmmm…”
“I had
to, since Quale wanted us to settle…”
“Www...
wh… WHAT!!!” (I noticed a few curious faces gawk in our direction but ignored
as if nothing had happened) “How many months are you settling at? 2 – 3?...”
(Oh how jealous I was at this point. I couldn’t let her know )
“Oh
actually I don’t care, it doesn’t matter anymore” “Then what…? I am listening”
“So we
visited the Gaeno & he advised us to discontinue. Me that is. But I should
give myself about two months for my body to adjust fully… Since I was on the
last few pills of that month, I stopped taking them…”
“So you
are implying that you were already planning for babies while I was still in
your life, spending numerous hours on the phone at night while far off talking
to you… tell me you are lying Cera…?”
“I am
sorry B… It’s just that…”
“It’s
just what…?” You think owning up to cheating now that we are separated or
whatever it is that you were doing while we were still in a relationship will
make things easier or better for that matter? Nkt!...” “Fast forward to where
the baby you are carrying is mine. I am even shocked you even executed
infidelity while with me. Whether the relationship was working or not, that was
very very unacceptable! Still is. But someday… you will pay. Nature will sort
you out on that one.”
“We
can do this later minus your rage Brian…”
“No,
carry on…”
“Thanks,
so that time, I came over to talk things out & I spent the night, I was off
the pill for a while, I thought that I would be on my safe days & was sure
nobody would happen. I therefore didn’t need to take a ‘morning after’…”
“All
that time you have been on the pill, you never once considered that it shifted
your cycle & thus your safe days?” “As a friend, you disappoint me. That’s
carelessness, to some extent you know…”
“I know,
but I was confused, a lot was going through my mind then…”
“So it
has happened, what do you want me to do?” “What do you need me to do?”
“That’s
why I am here… You tell me Brian”
“Go and
ask Quale about that! He is your boyfriend now! That’s a question that belongs
to him.”
“What do
I do B…? Really?”
“Seriously…!
Cera; the questions you are asking me are no longer in my league. Those are
husband material questions. I couldn’t reach that league right? Or rather I
couldn’t maintain my status. I was too what? Uncaring? Unavailable? Unfaithful?
He is your man now; go to him… you wanted children, now you got one… ”
“Is that
all you can say?”
“You
want me to insult you for hurting me?”
“Not
really, but you know…”
“Actually
I am not done! Do this, when we leave here tonight, get to bed with your Quale,
pretend you are very drunk & say that you are mature enough for whatever
protection you two use. Get ahead with your business & that’s it! Let him
know the baby is his until when it’s born & we will check with DNA after
it’s born…”
“Brian!
Just stop...!”
“Cera
I don’t trust you anymore, thank God I still have a little respect left for
you. The things you have proved this last few are way too difficult to handle
& believe for that matter. You just don’t act the way you do & treat me
as you wish then you expect me to let you in with arms wide open like I used
to!” “Things are different now. You! Cera! Made them different…”
I
noticed tears welling in her eyes & I realized round one was a win. Her
glass was almost full. For a moment I pitied her, mixed with some kind of love.
Took in her beauty that still screamed from every point of her body… but then I
realized that the fork in the path that she had decided to take, needed better
boots than I had on me… I excused myself to refill my glass and have a bite.
She didn’t look up. Not that I wanted her to. With her wave of her well
manicured hands, she gave me the approval.
I didn’t
hesitate… This wasn’t back in the day. I needed a breather.
Hi. Same Old Drama, Different Day. This blog is about me and others, nature, life, blah blah and why everything I like is great even the hurting - still great. If you disagree with anything you find on this page, Well. . . You are probably right..
I choose to believe it's fiction.
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