At first, I thought it
was one of those dreams where I have to see people messing up my mind. But it
was real, I pulled my phone from under my makeshift pillow. That was my bag,
the one with my supplies, and check the time. I was shocked to realize it was
four am. Why the hell were these people up so early!!!??? I could not
figure it out. Did it even matter really? The house was just too
much. Is it that they did not sleep, or they had just woken up early? The
noise came from the extreme corner of the barrack block. I tried to
eavesdrop on the conversation, which I don't think was eavesdropping really
because they were speaking so loud after all. The story was about the types
of women they had slept with.
Awkward conversation to start a day. I was still not sure whether these people
had slept or not.
I tried saying my morning graces but it was kinda difficult. I convinced myself
that my prayers had reached their destination and went ahead to pay more
attention to the conversation that was going on. I don't know if I took that
long to pray (or try to) or it was the conversation that was that volatile.
They were already talking about phones. Each was saying what they were
using. Makes and models.
“Have you heard we will not be having phones when the training starts?”
“Really?”
“Yeah, I heard that too” said another guy.
“Maybe it is true, or they are lying to us…” “I wouldn't know”
“Lets wait and see how that will turn out”
“I don’t even care, whether they pick them or not, life will go on”
I was trying to imagine how life would be without people around. Okay. I mean
people I was used to. Taking my phone back then would have been no big
deal. But now? It would mess me up. Considering this is being written
inside a bus on my way home.
I had nobody to text or to keep calling every other now and then. Therefore,
I concentrated further in this gadget talk that I cared less about. I
wished they talked about girls. I was as a curious as a cat back then. And as
if nature had heard me, talk of how somebody bought his girl a phone as a
parting gift changed the track if the conversation. This sounded
interesting. The group erupted in laughter and others could not believe what
they were hearing.
“Ati umenunulia dame simu?!!!” (You bought a girl a phone!)
Everyone burst out laughing again. Stupid thing to say I bet. Under the
circumstances.
“Afadhali hiyo pesa
ungeleta tukule mikate huku. Naskia utaihitaji kwa wingi.” (You would rather
have brought that money here, we eat bread. I hear we will need it in plenty)
So one guy bought a phone for his girl and instead of people congratulating
him. He became the laughing stock of the team. Alright. Let me try to
understand. This might turn out interesting.
Someone tried to seek an explanation.
“So ulibuy simu… (Silence)… “Sasa. Ulibuy ndio?” (“So you bought your
girlfriend a phone (silence)… why did you do that?)
You would have thought
this guy was the father.
“Si tuu tukuwe tunaongea…” (“So that we can be talking”)
“Oooohhh. Kuongea. Alafu mtaongea aje na simu zinaenda?” (“Okay, talking,
how will you talk and these phones will be taken?”) “Nani amesema zinaenda?” (“Who
said they will be taken?”)
I could sense the bitterness in him. From his heroic announcement to
this!!!???
Crazy. So... The interrogation continued.
“Ni dame yako, ama wife?” (“Is it your girlfriend, or your wife?”)
“Wife!”
“Okay afadhali!”
One guy from a top bunker shouted. “Bibi Wapi?”
“Hakuna, si ni bibi yangu tu.” (“She is just my wife… Just like that”)
“Okay, sawa.” (“Fine then”)
“Mko na watoto Wangapi?” (“How many Kids do you have?”)
“Bado” (“No kids yet”)
Laughter filled the corner again. And I sensed other people had woken up now
but were pretending to be asleep.
“So uko na bibi kwa nyumba, na hujaoa... (silence)… Na hauna watoto...” (“So
you have a wife in the house, not married, and no kids”)
“Na uko hapa miezi Tisa...” (“and you will be here for 9 months”)
“Na unamwita bibi...” (“and you are referring to her as your wife?”)
Its like these people had been doing this for their whole life. The interrogation
I mean. I figured these were the seasoned bullies we experience through the
course of life. There was a certain aspect of rare prowess in how they paused
for sickening duration before they dropped these rhetorical questions on this
guy. He was also encouraging them on I think. I would have ran out of the room
or excused myself for a blunt.
He sounded like a guy who had been tortured for a whole day when he responded
with a weak “kwani?”.
These were the very arguments that caused fights. I was so waiting for a day
opener.
They did not fight. But I knew it was not over. Instead, somehow the
conversation became a debate on how faithful people were. Someone bragged how
he had slept with six girls in the last one week and that is how he bid them
farewell.
“Kwanza saa hii wataingia box vizuri sana!”
“Haiii. Soldier! Nani hawezi taka kufyekwa na arrme?” “But sio ati wanajua
wenzao, Ziii!..” “Wewe nunuliana tu simu. Na saa hii kajohnie kanamconsole tu na tuko na wewe hapa, kaugali na mboga supu tu!”
(“Right now would be the best time to hit the jackpot with the ladies. A
soldier!!! Who wouldn’t want to get laid by a soldier? Not that they know each
other, One girl at a time. Keep buying them phones and maybe Johnie is consoling
her right now, and you are here with us eating ugali and cabbage soup in tins”)
To some extent that
made some sense. Some… Love is all that and blah blah blah, but enlisting in
the military is like working in a cruise ship or travelling abroad. These were
nine months without communication with the outside world, and you want to tell
me that a lady you met, and fell in love with, no rings, no children, will be
waiting for you after those nine months without a change of heart? Nooo… I was
excited too when I got that calling letter. Trust me. It is like I had received
a new lease of life and wanted to let go of the past. You remember it is only
yesterday I was wishing I had a girlfriend who I would have loved to share the boot
camp journey with. Now, I was not so excited about the thought of that. Probably
I would have bought them a phone as well. Thank God I couldn’t have afforded
any of the two.
People started sitting
up on their beds; some appeared as if they did not know where they were. Here I
was going through the high school experience all over again. I was yet to know
whether it would be better or worse. The threats were piling up by the hour. I could
not wait to see what we would be having for breakfast. I hear they will be
fattening us.
Chapter 12
Hi. Same Old Drama, Different Day. This blog is about me and others, nature, life, blah blah and why everything I like is great even the hurting - still great. If you disagree with anything you find on this page, Well. . . You are probably right..
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